Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Joyful christmahanakwanzzaka to all...

Just wanted to drop in an wish you a Merry x-mass and all...

Things have been interesting here. First I got an early x-mass present.

No clue what happened there but the short story is that I'm out $500 bucks for a new rear window. Fortunately Grand-ma-ma dropped some serious loot in my stocking.

Other wise the things have been good. My sister, her husband Adam, and his parents have been here for a few days so it has been lots of eating and drinking. Good times all around. I'll be on the bike next week to try to shed the pounds.

No more updates till i get back to Ill as I'm rocking out on dial-up which is like hitting myself in the head with a tack hammer. The other good news is that i've pretty much finished the entire first draft of my dissertation. revisions thus far have been minor so i'm still on target for a Jan 31st defense.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Midwest margarita...

So over the past week we've had some spectacularly crappy weather.  There were several inches of snow, and then everyone's favorite freezing rain.  The roads were some serious shit for quite a few days there.  I fought through the poo for a few days and managed to keep the commuter upright despite the black ice.  Then the thaw came.

The roads turned into a messy bowl full of cold, slushy, salty liquid I've dubbed the midwest margarita (MM).  Instead of the usual tequila, triple sec, and citrus; you get a tasty helping of grey-water, petroleum, and bum urine (seriously, I watched some hobo piss all over the side of the library across from my apt last night).  Throw in some salt, ice, and a paper umbrella and you're set.

Oddly enough the midwest margarita has similar effects on me as the original, after a few sips I usually feel like I'm going to vomit.  Neither tequila or the MM are real alcoholic beverages, no one really wants to drink them, and tequila is really just a sporting booze to be consumed only on dares, or directly after (or during) a bike race.  Try to remember that kiddies and you'll get pretty far in this world.

Friday, December 7, 2007

Winter is here...

We got our first real snow accumulation last night, and that means as soon as I start riding again I'll be bitching an a more regular basis on how the winters here in CU suck for riding.

But...since I'm not riding (busy dissertating, and healing from minor surgery), I have to find other ways to relax.  One way is to reminisce about the lovely days of summer (and being a watermellon).

Be sure to checkout the other episodes of the Meth Minute 39, especially Mike Tyson's Brunch-Out. 

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Piss poor at updating...

So i've been a bit busy writing my dissertation. I'm probably about halfway done with the first draft, and am on schedule for defending on Jan. 31st. Several of the Kiddies wanted me to waste time posting here so they could waste time reading it, so here you go.

This is some crazy shit that happened in a 4-cross race. Peeps are all about ghostriding, but this is another level.

In other crazy shit, lets look at a google map showing all of the homicides that occurred during 2007 in Baltimore.

Fortunately, the area surrounding JHU is pretty safe, but I'll be sure to try to get myself oriented before I go riding the commuter bike thru certain areas.

More to come in the coming days/weeks.

Saturday, November 17, 2007


So After staying at work 'till 7:00pm today the crew decided that the office in Urbana was the meeting place on account of Gina being back in town from Wasington (state). I needed a beer or 8. It was a fair time. The band was horrible, though they attempted to cover some really great songs. To all the highschool (college) garage bands out there here is a little hint, Lets not try to cover Hendrix or CCR right off the bat. These guys did their job really well and you are just bound to fuck it up. Forchristsake, they covered the beastie boys "fight for your right" and managed to massacre it.

So I get home and I see that the dirty has left me a nice comment refering me to his new favorite blog (aside from mine). Here is what a recent post had to say, "It's Friday Night. Time to go out, pound some PBRs, and liberate a hott or two from the clutches of a greasebag." Fantastic, this was pretty much my plan except I ended up at bunny's drinking old style with my friend Paul 'till 2AM, prophetic not so much. The kicker is that there were no more than 8 people at bunny's including the wait staff.

Aight, it is off to bed for me. Also, I'd like to announce a weekly event. I've named it the, " get Jamie Drunk on Friday nights extravaganza so that he can forget that he has to finish writing his thesis in less than a months time", for the time being. Please join me for copious amounts of PBR and old stylo to hlep drown my sorrows.


Sunday, October 28, 2007

Pre Halloween...

Last night several of the crew ventured into pampers-town to drink with some alumni as it was homecoming. It also happened to be the weekend before Halloween, so the costumes were out in full force. There were the usual suspects: Pop cutlure references, Slutty nurses, slutty maids, and slutty sluts (wait, those were just the girls from Kams and CO's). However, there were some good costumes in and around town. A bunch of people from the dance department dress up in full costume and dance to Michael Jacksons "Thriller", pretty impressive.

Some of the knuckle-heads from the team went as pac-man and some ghosts. the beauty of this is that they made huge cardboard cutouts and chased each other around town on their bikes (i'll try to get some pictures posted).

There were also a bunch of kids dressed up as "traffic cones". They would run put into the middle of an intersection when the lights were all red and "block" traffic.

There was also some dude dressed up as hello kitty.
oh yeah, hello kitty must have been having a bad day, she was toting a machine gun.

I've never been a huge fan of getting dressed up on Halloween, and I think I finally figured out why. I seem to lack the raw creativity to come up with a good costume. My muse encourages me to work with the situation at hand, but lets me wallow in front of a blank canvas. Now if someone draws a portrait on that canvas, I'll be there with a big black marker to make my additions.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Yup, I updated my blog...

...and you shall feel my wrath.

So about 6 months ago, the TSK said, "hey, you should really update your blog, that stupid picture of me has been up there for way too long." my response was to go dormant and let him suffer. I was ready to let this pass, and start an new with my new round of updates, but if it aint broken don't try to fix it. That said, change is good so here is an even more embarrassing photo from earlier in the year.

Now you probably can't tell from the photo, but this is Skeeter going "nuts over" the TSK. Words were said, a fracas ensued, and the TSK was saved a tea bagging by a few millimeters of denim. The horror.

FWIW, this image was taken during the MSU/U Mich race weekend. The MSU race was pretty cool. It was a 5.5 mile loop with about 1 1/4 mile stretch of dirt road. THe kicker was that the race pretty much started on this stretch and all hell broke loose. I think at least 15 guys never made it out of that first sector of dirt. Oh yeah I forgot that it was raining that day, so the dirt road was more of a mud pit.

The sun actually came out for our race, and mad the mud really tacky. The results of the race were pretty good too. I was the last guy across to the 6 man break that went on teh first lap and stayed away the whole time. Freshie and Matt from ND rolled me in the sprint, but I did pretty good seeing that it was the longest ride I had done in several months. The TSK picked up the scraps for 7th???

The next day at UM was another hard day in the saddle. It rained which mad the course a bit interesting. Lots of corners and some paint lines for good measure. Most everyone kept the rubber side down. TSK was aggressive, while i was a fat sack of shit worn out form the day before. It came down to a bunch and we came in 4th and 5th.

Monday, October 22, 2007

The off season...

Hey all, I know it has been over half a year since my last posting (yes there was snow on the ground), thus it is high time for some updates. many of you (or the one of you that actually might read this) might wonder what sparked this sudden re-entry to the blogging world. I've had several people from back in the day get a hold of me, and I figure that this is a good way for me to to keep you all updated on the haps and the craps of my existence on this planet. One of those peeps is Dirty Mike, he's just started a blog and it will certainly be interesting. He is a mainstay of IBRC history, so kiddies respect your elders and check it out. Oh yeah, i'm also pretty bored and writing here beats writing my Thesis.

So check back (or add my rss feeds in the sidebar on the right) in the near future to hear about the exciting past few months. A lot has gone on: I raced a bunch, didn't fall down, won some tall cash, got published, went to my sisters' wedding, got a job for next year, stole a boat, and pretty much stopped riding my bike as it is now the "off season". The recap begins soon. Till then, enjoy a fine malt liquor

Sunday, March 4, 2007

Snow Blower...

So I used to think that the best part of racing was getting to travel with your teammates. Hours logged in the car/hotel room certainly lead to some fond memories, but the events that transpired this weekend make me think that it is just not the same without the racing. Perhaps the fact that I was not in my typical post-race nutter phase —when I have no blood sugar and everything seems really odd to me—has skewed my view a bit, but here goes.

This weekend the Illini Cycling kiddies spent several hours in the car driving to and from races at nearby DePauw University and got in zero mins. of racing. Well, that is except for the TSK busting a hot lap (and later his nutsack) on the snow/ice covered crit course.

The RR on Saturday was canceled due to snow, but we thought the crtit might be held so we drove back the next morning. Overnight snow covered the course, but the promoter seemed determined to have the race.They even had guys with shovels, leaf blowers, and push brooms trying to get the course in a race worthy condition.

With the chance of racing looking slim we packed up and headed home in search of better weather.

Now I'm not saying that the trips were not fun. Lots of dead baby jokes etc kept the ride entertaining. Hell, Skeeter even made me spit water all over my dashboard at one point, but not racing left a void in my soul. Fortunately, my teammates helped me fill that void with pain and suffering on the afternoon group ride. Joy.

Next week we travel to Mizzou, and hopefully it will be a touch warmer there. We have an ITT on sunday, and frankly I'm gonna get my butt handed to me. There is nowhere to hide in the "race of truth" and any lack of fitness will be exposed.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Drum-roll please...

OK, so many of you have suggested meanings for FITB as pertains to FITB Mike, but sadly none of you were correct. It stands for Fill In The Blank Mike. I know that is super boring, but the point is that we have like upmteen mikes on the team each with a different preceding adjective. For example: Clean Mike, Dirty Mike, Shitty Mike, Hawaiian Mike, even bearded Mike who oddly enough is really some dude named mark that is on the Mizzou team. So following this lead is was looking for you to fill in the blank and give mike a proper name. Perhaps we just have to give it time, but now you should all be on the lookout for something apropos.

As for the others, Here is the breakdown:
Jared: The Breeze
"Well now they call me the breeze, I keep blowin' down the road". -Skynard
You must weigh about 12lbs soaking wet, not a lot of ballast to keep you from getting blown down the road.

Sean H: Sonar
This came out of the redneck fish-finder Incident at the Gander Mountain mountain store. Sorry to say that racism is still alive and well in our culture.

Alex: Boo
Not sure why, but you just seem like a boo. Seems to fit well with your housemates; Claus, Stoney, and the Boo. Like a bad 70's sitcom. Sadly, I lived with you for a year and you never did anything stupid enough to warrant a nickname. You need to work harder.

Steve: Tube Sock
"You do it to yourself you do, And thats what really hurts" -Radiohead.
You had to go and open your mouth and say "i better not be tube sock, they're nasty!" The powers that be (namely Boo and I ) decided that you get tube sock.

Again, none of these are set in stone. more like set in pudding (mmmm pudding). Drink heavily and maybe, just maybe, you'll do something stupid enough to get a better name.

In other news, Illini Cycling got some good press coverage today in the Daily Illini. Pretty nice stuff.

Monday, February 26, 2007

Keep 'em coming...

So I've received a few guesses as to the meaning of FITB Mike. Please feel free to make these as public comments even if they are quite lewd. For example a certain Female graced my inbox with these two gems: Fuck [her] in the butt Mike, and Fun In The Bath Mike. I'll ask him if he is looking for a date.

I've also had a few people asking to connect the monikers to the respective persons, but that will have to wait till later this week, as I still need to consult with the powers that be.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

And so it begins...

The MWCCC road season got off to an interesting start this weekend. C-bach, TSK, Claus, Skeeter, Skeefer, the breeze, waffles, FITB Mike, boo, tube sock, sonar, Brett the photo guy, the juicy girl, and yours truly packed up and headed to Ohio for a Crit and RR hosted by The Ohio State University. I've placed emphasis on the "the" ( an awesome 80's band BTW) as anyone that attends the Ohio State University will have no problem reminding you to add that oh so important article to the beginning. Right now most of my readership is wondering who all of the nicknames above belong to. Quite honestly I made almost all of the newbies nicknames up. Some of them have relevance to events that transpired during the course of the weekend, and others I just flat out bullshitted. If you've made it this far, please leave comments trying to match them up with those who attended. Bonus points if you can figure out what FITB means, there are some super secret double bonus points related to that as well, but you'll have to figure that out on your own. Also feel free to suggest some nicknames.

If you have a metallic taste in your mouth right now, feel free to remove the gun barrel as I'll make the race summary mostly pain free and I do not wish to be responsible for the death of all three people that read my drivel.

Skeefer and Waffles (that is a freebie) represented in the C's placing 9th and 6th, respectively. This is very impressive seeing that it was Skeefer's first race.

In the A race, one dude went really fast, TSK went faster than all but the guy who went really fast, Claus and I went pretty fast while skeeter and C-bach went just as fast as claus and I but were "le tired" and the officials told them to take a nap, then fire the missiles.

The RR was canceled due to the poo storm of ice that fell overnite.

Thursday, February 22, 2007


So in response to yesterdays post about stiff goats the fates decided that I needed to be taught a little lesson. About 8:30 AM, while riding to go see the doctor about my continuing medical troubles, I was smote by some deftly placed black ice. I was in traffic going about 2 mph while standing up waiting for the car in front of me to get moving when I hit said patch of ice. Man, I went down like a sack of grits falling off the back of a pickup truck. Fortunately, traffic was moving slowly enough that i didn't get pancaked by the car behind me. To add insult to injury, while staning on the side of the road trying to get make sure that my body was still working properly, some chick came cruising by on a hybrid, and didn't even bat an eyelash at the ice I hit.

Moral of the story is don't make fun of goats or people that fall off of their bicycle, no matter how tempting it may be.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Tour of Cali and goats...

So I was watching the coverage of Stage 1 of the ToC and witnessed the HUGE crash that took out much of the field (click the "peloton pileup" video on this page). I couldn't help by think aobut those silly little fainting goats. These adorable little buggers freeze up when scared, and if they are moving, they often just topple over. A little news clip on fainting goats is here. Be sure to watch till the end to hear a "goat lover" describe how they "get stiff".

Friday, February 16, 2007


So it has been over a week since my last posting and a lot has gone on.

Last weekend, the majority of the Turin Squad got together to talk shop about the coming race season, meet some of the new staff & team members, and get some testing done. The big surpirse was new member Erik "E.T." Tomlinson showed up with a new hair style. Eric is on the right in the image below. He used to rock a ponytail, now he's gone corporate.

Aside from planning out our race season, we all got our body fat percentage measured. It was a little painful, but not too bad. THe results are in and it is official, I'm in a good range at 7% and the TSK is indeed skinny with a whopping 4.2%. Crunching some numbers that comes out to about 7 lbs. of fat on his skinny frame. I'm willing to be that there are women with at least seven pounds of breast. Oh hell, I just googled "7 pound boobs" and this is the first hit listed. The link is safe for work, and points out another use for a kitchen scale (aside from weighing various bike parts).

Anyhoo, On tuesday we got a shit tonne of snow. Actually it was only about 15". Growing up out east and going university in upstate NY, snow is not really a big deal to me, but the metropolis of C-U is not prepared for such amounts of white stuff. Sidewalks are not shoveled, roads are not plowed and good luck trying to find a rack to lock your bike to. I think we need to make bike igloos out of the six foot piles of snow where the bike racks used to be.

I'll leave you with an image stolen from weatherunderground. It shows the Temperature history for the past month along with the average High and Low for this time of year.

You probably can't tell, but the two smooth semi-horizontal lines are the average high and low, not that the daytime high has been lower than the average low, bloody cold. THey keep calling this weather pattern an "Alberta clipper". Canada, take back your fucking weather!!!! —we'll keep your cheap prescriptions.

Wednesday, February 7, 2007

Back in the chilly midwest...

So while I was away in DC, winter finnaly showed up. It's been silly cold out with highs in the single digits. To add to the fun old man winter dropped four or so inches of snow yesterday. The warmest day forecasted in the next week is 25F, not really warm enough to clean up the back roads that we ride on. Perhaps I'll break out the MTB if we get a day that is not too cold.

The weather in Malaysia is a bit warmer, and my friend Brad just cracked a top three finish after finishing 4th in several stages at the tour of Langkawi. He's seen on the right of the picture swerving out of the way a bit.

Brad is living the dream and racing with some of the big boys of cycling. I'm curious if slipstream (formerly TIAA-CREF) will get a bid to Paris-Roubaix, it would be super cool to see some of our up and coming American riders get to do some of the real spring classics.

In other news, I've received a mostly clean bill of health from my Doctor. The meds have cleared up my lungs quite a bit, and I think I'll be easing back into training this week. The big issue was that she felt that I wasn't drinking enough, and I'm sure that a cure for that can be found at the Inn on a thursday nite.

Monday, February 5, 2007

D to the C...

So I'm chillin in D.C. for a few days attending a program review. It is basically a symposium where all of the groups funded by the Stewardship Sciences Academic Alliance program get together and present the progress that they've made in the past few years. Generally boring stuff. I was there from 7:00AM till 8:00PM and pretty worn out.

There were some odd happenings today. For one, Ralph Nader just happened to stop by while we were having a cocktail hour to mooch some free snacks. Apparently he has some space in the building that we were in. He didn't even stop by to see my poster. That prick is certainly not getting my vote next election.

After the conference I was heading to a bar to have some drinks with my old college roommate Pat. We called him 'trick in school because the latter part of his proper name didn't get the attention it deserved. So while walking to the bar, I saw one (or two) of the strangest things. A guy was walking two dogs, and each had only three legs. Either this guy is a sick fuck that is handy with a saw, or he has a membership to the DC chapter of the three-legged APSCA.

It was nice to catch up a bit. Everyone I know is growing up and getting married/having kids, Pat is getting hitched next spring. We shot the usually shit about life, and shared some laughs looking back on our younger years in undergrad. All in all a good time.

Friday, February 2, 2007

It could be worse...

So I was back to the doctor today. No earth shattering news yet, but i have some lab work due to come back on Monday. Speaking of lab work, while waiting form my number to be called —they use numbers so that your testing is anonymous so you can feel OK about giving blood for a HIV test etc—a certain course of events took place making me realize that my it could be worse. A young lady walks past me to the window of the lab, hands over her slip to which I hear the nurse respond, "would you like to leave your stool sample with us now, or deposit it at home". Now for one, the nurse didn't shout this from the top of the mountain, but she didn't exactly whisper it either. Now think about the choices this poor girl has: 1. Pinch a stool in a public bathroom where everyone in the waiting room knows what she is doing, 2. Go home only to have carry a piece of your own shit back to the medical center. In the grand scheme this is probably not really a big deal to her for the simple reason that if someone has asked you to shit in a bag so that they can look at it, you probably have something seriously wrong with your plumbing and are willing to swallow a little of your pride in order to get it fixed. So as this girl took off her sweatshirt and marched off the the bathroom to get down to business, I thought that I was pretty fortunate to have a rather pedestrian infection. Just remember, no matter if you feel like a bag of shit, at least you don't have to shit in a bag.

Monday, January 29, 2007

I Fall Down...

The Pro Road season has started down in Qatar which means that the crashing has begun as well.

First mass start stage and poor Tom Steels gets chopped by Brownie and literally kisses the pavement. Mind you this is not one of those euro cheek pecks that the podium girls give, rather more like the sloppy tonsil hockey that takes place at KAM's which often results in a trip to the hospital. Seriously this sucks pretty bad. He broke his shoulder blade in the season opener, now he's probably got umpteen months of recovery.

In more local news, it is official, I am a fat sack of shit. I did a little testing on the bike today and my month long hiatus has reduced me to the level of a mediocre CAT V racer. I'll put it out there right now, if you have ever wanted to whoop my ass in a sprint, now is the time. The good news is that there is nowhere to go but up from here. See you on the road, I'll be the guy huddled in the gutter waiting for someone to put me out of my misery.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Side effects...

Stomach upset, diarrhea/loose stools, nausea, vomiting, or stomach/abdominal pain may occur.

The joys of getting better. I was back to the M.D. today. She figured that after 3.5 weeks, this was not going to pass on its own. Thus I'm on the technological wonder known as a "Z-Pack". Hopefully I won't be subjected to any of the aforementioned side effects, which are more commonly occurring than say amoxicillin. Problem there is that I can't take any penicillin derived antibiotics. Some where along the way I developed a little allergy to penicillin. The fun thing about this is that you only find out that you have the allergy if you have an adverse reaction. Fortunately for me this happened in the form of a skin rash while still hopped up on pain meds following surgery, and I didn't give a shit if the antibiotic was killing me.

So I hope to be back on my Bicycle in the next day or so and get back to some real training. I've pretty much decided to pick up where I left off and start training at the beginning of Base 2. I lost about a month and the miles/interval work that you put in this time of year is not easily made up for once the racing starts. This means that i'll be a bit sluggish early in the year, but all the racing I have planned should help my fitness come around in time for NCCA nationals and the big spring races.

Sophia, thanks for the postcard. Any plans to try to catch some of the spring classics?? I hear Roubaix is cold, wet, and muddy this time of year.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Fun with science...

Since i'm still too sick to actually ride my bike, I figured i'd lend the kiddies a hand and have some fun checking the calibration of several powertaps. C-Bach, Klaus, Devo, the TSK and I ventured to my lab to drop some plates in the name of science.

Here is a pix of TSK and Klaus setting up the testing facility.

I'll spare you the details, but it turns out that everyone's hubs were within experimental error of spec.

In other news, I'm going back to the doctor tomorrow with the hope of getting to the bottom of my illness. I'm starting to think I might have something chronic like an allergy to something in my apartment and that is keeping me from fully kicking this bug. What used to be simply an annoyance of feeling a little shitty has turned into a bad cough with no sign of going away. I figure if I'm not better by sunday (one month of feeling like shit), I'll try employing a shotgun to clear my sinuses (along with the rest of my skull).

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Quip of the day...

While working on our poster presentation (poster:graduate school::diorama: grade school) for the upcoming project review in Feb. One of the Professors remarked that it was, "too many words and not enough figure" to which I responded, "Reminds me of a girl I dated in high school". Zing.

As per the TSK's request I've been trying to turn off my filter so that the world can be a entertaining place at the expense of the few.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Hypoxia, resolutions, and 5 hours of energy...

With the temp just below 20F, I decided that lifting weights at the gym was a better option than freezing to death. Like every year the 40,000+ students of UofI have decided that their resolution for the new year is to "get in shape". This results in every piece of equipment in the gym being taken up by people that will quit after they realize that drinking beer is more fun than going to the gym. All in all it is not too bad, as people are generally nice about letting you work in etc, but i really think that there was a ventilation problem today. I was finding that I was not recovering well between sets, and that i was a little short of breath. This was not a big deal until I almost fell over when getting off of the leg press. With a light head, and blurred vision, I stumbled across the gym thinking that I was having a stroke or a major cardiac event. It may have just been an asthma attack, but in any case it was not cool. So to the masses of cardio kings and queens, stop taking up everyones f-ing oxygen.

Perhaps I was just a little tired and I could use some five hour energy. If you need to take something that will give you energy for 5 hours you do need to "get in shape".

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Toast (again), Dirtbags, and soggy bottoms...

So it has been a few days since i've posted so here is the run down. I've been busy preparing presentation materials for a program review i have in Washington, D.C. in early February. Lots of fun sitting in a room with the four other grad. students that work on the project with me trying to condense our work into some thing that is "presentable" and tells a decent story.

Speaking of presentable, the memorial service for Fritz was yesterday afternoon. All in all it was a really nice service for the family with friends of Fritz relating stories from their past. I think everyone left feeling blessed that they knew Fritz and many of us wishing that we had spent a little more time with him. Back to the presentable comment, Most of you know that vanity is not one of my vices and have probably never seen me wearing proper dress attire. Ms. Pace accompanied me to the services and said that I was looking "very handsome", a nice compliment. While at the service, I had at least 4 other people say "wow, you polish up nicely", read between the lines and you get "wow, you're not dressed like a dirtbag". I love backhanded compliments, they are so full of truth it is not even funny.

Riding the past few days has been interesting with the temps at a steady 36F accompanied by rain and mist. Despite the weather we had several people show up for the group rides. Ms. Cole accompanied me to Gifford after splitting off from C-Bach and Dieter from sprockets. I came across an interesting fact while at the Casey's in Gifford. Apparently they make crackers that taste like toast. I think it is important that these crackers are "toast flavored" and not "toasted crackers" this means that they had to formulate a toast flavor and add it to the crackers. Fucking odd.

In other toast related fun, next time you are bored (or drunk) and at the food store, as the service counter to direct you to the "toast" it will usually take a min. or so for them to realize that they don't sell toast but they do have bread. However, do not attempt this while at the Bashas in Sedona, AZ. THey have "toast" listed on one of the aisles. Apparently this refers to miniature sliced loaves of bread (also know as cocktail bread), and does not qualify as toast in my book.

Thursday, January 11, 2007


So Craig commented that the weather forecast called for strong winds today, and we got them bigtime. I got back from my two hour jaunt to Sadorus and the current conditions were winds from the SSW 26MPh gusting to 35MPH. Sounds like fun. Fortunately it was pretty warm (above freezing) so it was actually a pretty comfortable rides (aside from the fact that I was in my 25t going 12MPH for a good amount of the ride). It looks like the next few days are going to be wet and near freezing which may lead to some roller derby action.

A side note is that Sadorus is a quaint farming community of 450 residents and is the home of the Sea History Museum. A quick look at a map of of the United States shows that having a Sea Museum in central Illinois makes about as much sense as having a "Ham and Cheese Sandwich" museum in Jerusalem.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Back in the saddle...

"To cast off sloth now well behooves you. For resting upon soft down, or underneath the blankets cloth, is not how fame is won—without which, one spends life to leave behind as vestige of himself on earth the sign smoke leaves on air, or foam on water. So stand and overcome your panting—with the soul, which wins all battles if it does not despond under its heavy body's weight...If you understand me, come: act now, to profit yourself"
-Spoken by Virgil to Dante in the 8th circle of Hell

So I'm nearly over my illness and really need to get back on the bike. It always amazes me at how much more productive I am when riding, and that is in all my efforts, personal, academic and cycling. I hit the trainer for an hour tonight, and I'm sure to piss off the neighbors with the racket that my old P.O.S. mag trainer makes. Perhaps the rollers are a better option. Hopefully the weather will cooperate tomorrow and i'll be able to get a few hours in.

Tuesday, January 9, 2007


So while my blogging efforts should be related to cycling, I've been sick for a week or so now, and should finally be getting back on the bike. Hopefully then i'll have some entertaining bike related postings.

With regard to a comment about the throngs of women in my pantry, this a very funny because it is somewhat true. All I can say is that if you ever want a bulgarian woman to take interest in you, follow my advice: pick her up and drop her squarely on her head. Several hours later she'll probably crawl thru the bushes behind your house at 4:00 in the morning, and ask to come in for a while.

In other news, today apple announced the highly anticipated iphone. This is a really interesting piece of technology, and quite possibly the coolest "smart phone" out there. The user interface is based on a touch screen that is totally badass. Apple amazes me with some brilliantly simple ideas like "Visual Voicemail" which shows you a list of voicemails so that you can select which you want to hear first. No more of this "press 6 to skip next message" crap. This probably isn't a big deal for most of my readers, but imagine if you were a busy business type that was just in a two hour meeting and you have thirteen waiting voicemails.

Alas, I don't make the bank to afford one of these (i can't imagine what the service plan costs), but maybe there will be some trickle down in the form of a standalone widescreen ipod.

Uninvited Guests...

4:30 AM I awake to a dull thud followed by some scratching noises. Half asleep it takes me a moment to determine that there is an animal somewhere in my apartment. Sitting quietly in bed it determine that thankfully it in not in my bedroom. While putting on some serious clothing to protect my self from the beast, i try to figure out just what I'm gonna have to deal with when I open my door. Raccoon down the chimney? Another Bat? My best guess is that is is a squirrel that has either gotten in the vent for my bathroom fan or somehow managed to get into one of the interior walls between my room and the bathroom. The the time I have prepared for battle the ruckus has stopped, which is almost worse as now I have no idea where this thing is. I carefully poke around the apartment and find nothing. Totally bizarre. Thankfully it found its way out so that I didn't need to call animal control to come but open a wall in the middle of the nite.

Sunday, January 7, 2007

Faux Pas...

So a post on the TSK's bloggy reminded me of an encounter I had while in Cali. Near the midpoint of my four and a half hour trek through Santiago canyon, I caught sight of a rider ahead of me. I notched the pace up a little to see if I could reel him in for a little company. Upon catching said rider I notice that he is wearing a jersey decorated in red white and blue. I pull along side say hi, but he appears to be ensconced in an "iPod Cocoon". I take this a a sign that he is not wanting to be sociable, and he would rather be alone with his music. I continue on at my tempo up the next climb only to realize that he has latched firmly to my wheel. As we crest the hill I ease off and attempt to start conversation a second time to determine if i need to do a "Hubbard Drop". He responds by pulling an earbud out and we chat a bit. Still a bit put off by his earlier dis, after a little banter I drop the bomb regarding his jersey. It came out as "Is that an 'earned' jersey?", he looked at me befuddled, so i rephrased, "where did you get that jersey". These words were chosen carefully as it is hard to tell if it was an actual national championship jersey, or one that looks like it that is available in some catalogues. He responds, "Park City". I congratulate him and ask what discipline etc. It turns out that this guy, Kerry Farrell, won the Masters 45-49 Road Race in 2005. We continued our ride for another 15 miles or so till he got back to his hotel in Irvine, and enjoyed some decent conversation along the way.

The moral of the story is, if you come across some one in a stars and bars jersey, simply ask where they got their jersey, if they say "performance" feel free to drop the hubbard, but be prepared that the person next to you might be a national champ.

Saturday, January 6, 2007

Pudding time...

I've been a bit under the weather for the past few days. Actually looking back probably since last Sunday. This may explain the mystery pains I was experiencing earlier this week. Feeling a bit down , figured a little comfort food was in order so I whipped up some rice pudding. I really wanted some bread pudding with a nice bourbon sauce (Nothing makes you feel better than sugar and booze), but I didn't have any bread to use.

Nick D. and I are going on a ride tomorrow (if I'm feeling up to it). It has been a while since I've seen him so it should be a good couple of hours of catching up. Nick was one of the "killer B's" (SWARM!!!!!) on the Illini Squad, and will be stepping up to race with the TSK and I this spring along with several other of last years B's.

Anyway, Hopefully in the near future I'll have some shit to rant about (which was the initial purpose of this blog. If nothing else, I have some long rides to next week, and i'll comment on all of the random crap that goes thru my head while on a multi-hour frozen cornfield excursion.

Thursday, January 4, 2007

Farewell to a good man...

Sad news this morning. Fritz Miericke, local bike shop owner, passed away early in the morning of Tuesday Jan. 2nd. Fritz was fortunate enough to have a job that he truly loved. Anyone that spent a few minutes in Champaign Cycle appreciated his warm nature and enthusiasm.

This is not the way things should happen. The Dead Milkmen said it pretty well in Life is Shit:

Cause life takes from us the things we love
And it robs us of the special ones
And it puts them high where we can't climb
And we only miss them all the time
And we sing: Life is shit...

Fortunately for all of those who new Fritz realize that life really isn't all too bad, even though we'll miss him a lot, we can smile when we think back on all of the people that he has helped find the joy that can be found in a warm smile and a bicycle.

My most sincere condolences to his Family, who will certainly miss him most of all.


Wednesday, January 3, 2007

It 's official...

I'm old.

For the past two days, i've been dealing with mystery pains throughout my body. I got up yesterday and was unable to lift my right arm above shoulder level due to shooting pain in my upper back. Later, that pain subsided and my left knee started acting up. It was bad enough that going up and down stairs was difficult and riding home was really a pain. Today, the knee was a little better till just after noon, when I was going up stairs and was like wow, my knee feels better, and ran up the last flight.

Bizarre to say the least. This is the price you pay to race masters events.

Tuesday, January 2, 2007

Death, Dope, and Dental Floss...

"Moving to Montana Soon, Gonna be a dental floss tycoon" -Frank Zappa

Montana by Zappa was just on the radio,and i couldn't help but share.

In other news, I recently joined the dopers suck group on Facebook. The regular website for DS is here. There are several websites that promote the general "don't dope" idea, and the content is varied. Two sites that are a bit out of control are Stolen Underground and Race Clean. SU is run by Matt DeCanio, who felt the pressure to dope, did, was suspended, and is now trying to help that from happening to others (well the first two parts at least). His style is not very polished and it has caused him lots of problems in the past even costing him a pro contract after his suspension had been served. Personally I can't stand the way he presents himself (although he seems to be shaping up a bit) as he often comes across as whiny and doesn't seem to think about the repercussions of his words. I suppose this is his way of doing things and i commend him for sticking to his guns, but i think he scares more people off than he realizes.

As for Race Clean, Upon first look this looks like a pretty legit site, with lots of "heroes" that are dope free and behind the movement. My big issue is with the "blacklist" . No real proof is offered up for the names listed, and there are wholesale indictments of entire groups of people (e.g. coaching services) and peoples wives. Calling someone's wife a "slut" has nothing to do with doping an just reduces any credibility you may have had to zilch.

Another site is rideclean.net. These guys actually seem to care about their image and do a pretty good job of getting the word out without needlessly slandering anyone.

Hopefully our wonderful sport can dig itself out from under the black dirt that it trying to kill it.

Speaking of death, I was at the food store (east coast for supermarket or grocery store) and apparently someone found a cure for death. It was in Weekly World News so it must be true.